Note to Self:
1. You've already made progress--keep working hard!
I know you've spent hours obsessing over pictures of IFBB Pros, wondering to yourself when the hell you ever got the delusional idea that you'd ever look remotely like those girls. Well, believe it or not, you CAN. Tiffany Boydston and countless others started right where you did and look at them now, tearing up national stages everywhere. Don't think for a second that you're any different or that it's impossible for you. It's entirely possible and I think deep down you knew that when you started. As a matter of fact, I'm entirely sure that that's why you started this in the first place--you KNOW it's possible, in fact, it's inevitable--if you put in the work. Now get your butt back on that treadmill!
2. Ignore the scale--I know YOU know it's working.
The terror, the dread, the hesitant toe-touch to warm up that damn piece of glass. The double zeros appear...deep breath. here goes nothing....and...aaaand...UGH! Yeah, it goes a little something like that...It's so easy to get caught up in that number, to beat your pretty little self up about it for weeks on end. I know it sucks, slaving all week long in the gym, dragging yourself out of bed and out the door towards hours of lifting and cardio, only to find your efforts have been wasted the moment you step on the scale. Well, my dear, that's life...and that's how it's going to be for a while. I know you look to your right and see the boy celebrating a 5-week, 20 lbs. weight loss, but you know that should not be getting you down. First off, he's a BOY and second, he had further to go than you. Now he's on that last 15 lbs. and the playing field is even! Just look in the mirror, dude--I know you feel yourself leaning out. Don't get down on the number and just keep working hard. You'll get there too.
3. You've been overweight for 26+ years, it'll take more than 5 weeks to lose it all.
I know you want to be an overnight success. I know you wake up every morning secretly hoping that the mirror will magically reveal a 100 lb. tight, lean little you, but alas, you're not there...YET. Calm yourself, it's only been a month and a half and you're doing just fine. For years upon years, you were perfectly content pigging out and being overweight...don't forget that just 3 short years ago you were at your heaviest and since then you've shed 10 (yes, TEN) dress sizes and roughly 40 (yes, FORTY) pounds. You're in the home stretch and you knew this part was going to be the hardest--hang in there.
4. You're not really hungry.
It's been an hour...ONE hour since your last meal. Remember back like 3 months ago when you only ate every 4-5 hours? Yeah, you can stick this out for another 90 minutes.
5. Reward/Cheat Meals will taste that much better once you've EARNED them.
I know all that food looks so damn tempting. I know you obsessively Pin pictures of gorgeous, mouth-watering food that it feels like you'll never be able to eat again. But you know as well as I do that the moment you're able to sink your teeth into that juicy bacon cheeseburger (with a side of Tums, of course), it'll all be worth the wait. You'll have accomplished something you never in your wildest dreams thought possible, and yes--victory will be sweet. :)
6. You're HOT!
I've seen you. Those passing glances. Those brown eyes lingering in the mirror for 4, 5, 6 seconds. Yeah, that's right. I've seen you checking yourself out in the reflection of that store window. Go ahead, girl! You look damn good and you know it!! So yeah, you're not at your goal weight yet. You're not in "competition shape" but you and I both know you've worked damn hard to get to where you're at today and it shows. Take it in, you deserve it!
7. Even if NO ONE ELSE does, I believe in you.
I know there are those days when you feel like no one understands, no one "gets it" and even though everyone feigns excitement and offers up their words of "encouragement," you feel like no one really honestly believes that you can do this. Well you know what? Who the eff cares? I believe in you, ok? I believe that you can get there, that you can power through that last 20 minutes of cardio, those last 4 sets of your circuit. I believe that you're going to look so ridiculously good on stage. So there. Forget them--this is about YOU.
8. You're training with the BEST!
Why did you hire Kimbo? Because he's the best. He trains the best...and YOU will be the BEST.
9. You're not alone.
So I know you feel like you're completely on your own sometimes. Your family and friends can listen and try to learn about what you're doing, but they'll never really "get it." Even D--walking beside you every day, training with you, eating with you--well, there are just things that he'll never really understand about what it's going to take to get you on to that competition stage, and that's okay. When you feel lost and alone, just remember--there are thousands of Pro and Amateur Bikini Competitors out there who've been exactly where you are today--who've struggled and stalled, who've been sore and achy and tired, who've fought through the ups and downs and somehow found it in them to pick their sweaty selves off of the floor and power through those last 20 minutes of cardio. They've been there, they've done it, they've faced it, they've conquered it--and so can you. You're never, never, never alone.
10. Enjoy this.
I know it seems crazy to say this now, but one day, not too long from now, you're going to be on the other side of this mountain. You're going to be an NPC Bikini Competitor. You're going to have one National Qualifier under your belt, 12+ weeks of Contest Prep behind you, and the bikini, tan, and clear heels to prove it...You only get one First Competition, only one First Prep...so enjoy it. Enjoy the struggles, the challenges. Learn from it, grow from it so that one day you can look back at it and have something real and tangible to be proud of. Take a deep breath in and soak it all in--you're almost there. :)